rules/regulations/respect

I once played an on-the-brink-of-a-psychotic-break high school principal in a campy 1950s musical about an Elvis styled zombie. This is probably the only role I’ll ever share in common with RuPaul…but time will tell. Anxiety ridden over achiever that I am, Ms. Delilah Strict’s headlining refrain “rules, regulations and respect” resonates with me to this day.  In terms of this project I think it is important to document my philosophy for judging others work be it restaurants, cookbooks, products or opinions. Because, seriously, judgement is well, judgement. And this is my good faith effort to explain why and how I judge.

Rules

1. Anything I write about I personally paid for or experienced.

2. This is my fun time so I don’t have to write any certain amount of words or frequency or ick. This is for me more than it is for you. Sorry.

3. It pains me to leave less than a 20% tip. Even if I thought you were a worthless waiter – you still get a 20% tip from me. Because people be working hard for the money – and that means they can’t possibly be at their best every moment, but are still deserving of the 20% tip. Also I worked behind the counter of a pizza place and never got tipped, which drove me nuts. Ergo, I tip like crazy. I consider it a form of tithing or economic stimulus.

Regulations

1. My opinions cannot be solicited and are not for sale. Any ads you see here are because I use a free WordPress platform and this is how they pay their bills. Using the free WordPress platform and working in the real world is how I pay mine.

2. I will only share photos I think are really worth seeing. I take a lot of photos of food (ok and my dog), and most of them are, well, shit. Food photographs terribly. Everybody knows it. So I don’t need to be sharing my shitty food photos with you. If I get a good one, I’ll share.

3. I am not an English teacher nor do I geek out on grammar. My formative writing years occurred during a period where they taught neither phonics nor sentence diagraming, punctuation, etc. I rely heavily on spell check and am aware of my own deficits, no need to remind me, please see above about this being for me (I’m looking at you Dad). xxoo.

Respect

1. I am not a chef, a restauranteur, a writer or a food producer. I am an eater. And a moderate to poor home cook. I read cookbooks a lot and cook little. I dine out a lot and am impressed little. I have expectations and I know it. But I absolutely respect those who throw their life into something challenging, soulful and dangerous – chef, restauranteur, writer and food producer among them.

2. My house is always dirty, sometimes I serve undercooked meat (but it’s ok Julia did it too), and I tend to under salt most everything. I know, you can’t wait to come over. I don’t expect your respect as a chef, restauranteur, writer or food producer…and definitely not as a homemaker. I do expect it as a patron, customer or reader because that is a role I play very, very, well.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s